The Hottest Male Video Game Characters of All Time!
It’s no secret that many female game characters are designed for the male gaze. Unpopular opinion alert: I don’t mind that. I like playing with hot female characters as much as the next person, but my true tastes lie elsewhere.
I don’t often salivate over the male characters in games–for one thing, they don’t quite fill out short shorts and a tank top quite like Lara Croft does, for instance, but every once in a while I play a game and become as enamored with the character’s looks as I am with the way he wields his broadsword.
Here, I’ve made a list of the hottest male video game characters of all time–in no particular order.
1. Geralt from Witcher 3
You have no clue how many naked and/or scantily clad pictures of Ciri, Yennefer, and Triss that I had to wade through to find this.
Anyway, Geralt is the perfect mix of beauty, brains, gruffness, and compassion. I prefer the video game version of this exotic hunk to Henry Cavill’s portrayal in Netflix’s Witcher (though I wouldn’t throw Cavill out of my boudoir).
I even find him hot once he gets all veiny and crazy looking after drinking potions and Decoctions.
Yup, I got it bad!
2. Barret from Final Fantasy VII Remake
Once I got past Barret’s comically “black” dialogue (it’s like his dialogue was written by a non-black person who got their reference material from a rap video–but I’ve made peace with it), I was able to enjoy him for the multi-dimensional character that he is! Also, I realized that he’s hot!
He’s tall, barrel-chested, tatted, covered in muscle, and super duper manly. I like a bad-boy, and Barret’s the baddest; he has a gun for an arm for crying out loud.
Barret is passionate, intimidating, and arguably a lot more effective with his arm artillery than Cloud’s close range hack and slash. He believes in something, and I believe in something, too: that he’s a total hunk!
Barret Wallace can speak to me louder than he needs to any day!
3. William J. Blazkowicz, Wolfenstein Series
The only thing harder than Wolfenstein gameplay is BJ Blazkowicz’s body.
He’s got a jawline to die for, he’s fearless, and can take a beating. Also, he hates Nazis, and that makes him hot on its own.
Since Wolfenstein games are First Person Shooters, you don’t get to see BJ often, so whenever I was blessed with a cut scene I made sure to get my fill of him–and I was never disappointed.
4. Niko Bellic from GTA 4
Nico isn’t traditionally handsome, but he has a heart of gold and knows how to handle himself in a gunfight.
Image courtesy of D3nte from DeviantArt.com
Nico has a sexy Yugoslavian accent and doesn’t take any shit from anyone. He’s one of my favorite GTA protagonists, and I loved dressing him up to my satisfaction since his default style left much to be desired. I don’t mind a fixer upper.
Image courtesy of Voggens from DeviantArt.com
See? He’s got that bum-chic thing going on. Yum.
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There’s no doubt that gaming is about so much more than the attractiveness of the character you get to live through for a few hours. However, I’m sure any seasoned gamer can agree, a little eye candy never hurt anyone; in fact, it makes playing your favorite game all the sweeter.
Prosepunk 